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Hi, It depends on the gun. While .380 has lower recoil than 9mm, the problem is that a lot of .380 gun actually recoil as much as 9mm (if not more). A lot of .380 use direct blowback which amplified the recoil on .380. If you want a low recoil .380, look for gun that does NOT have direct blowback such as Glock 42 or M&P380 Shield EZ. If recoil sensitivity is a real issue, M&P380 Shield EZ is a great option. Check on (1)un (2)roker. Just replace (1) & (2) with G & B. I saw a lot of M&P380 Shield EZ floating around there right now (including accessories). I hope this helps.

Howard, recoil is about 30% less Sir. There are several models that I have tested in order of ease to shoot and my wife now carries the S&W Shield .380 EZ. . https://www.budsgunshop.com/product_info.php/products_id/101524/smith+%26+wesson+m%26p380+shield+ez+380acp+36%22+8%2b1+manual+safety+11663 -------------------------- (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EnnNoPM3EsU)

Howard, what really matters is how your wife feels about it. Best bet would be to take her to a range where you can rent handguns and let her try a couple of different models and calibers and let her decide what she is most comfortable with. The best gun is one she will actually be able/comfortable using when and if the need ever arises. Don't choose based on caliber alone.